Four Worms

A
minister
decided that
a visual demon-
stration would add
emphasis to his Sunday
sermon. Four worms were
placed into four separate jars.
The first worm was put into a
container of alcohol. The second
worm was put into a container of
cigarette smoke. The third worm
was put into a container of choc-
olate syrup. The fourth worm was
put into a container of good clean
soil. At the conclusion of the ser-
mon, the Minister reported the
following results: The first worm
in alcohol - Dead. The second
worm in cigarette smoke - Dead
Third worm in chocolate syrup
- Dead. Fourth worm in good
clean soil - Alive. So the
Minister asked the con-
gregation – What did
you learn from this
demonstration???

Maxine was sitting in the back,
quickly raised her hand and
said, ‘As long as you drink,
smoke and eat chocolate,
you won’t have worms!’

We Really Can't Win

A woman was shaking out a rug on the balcony of her 17th floor apartment when a sudden gust of wind blew her over the railing.

"Damn, that was stupid,"

she thought as she fell.

"What a way to die."

As she passed the 14th floor, a man standing at his railing caught her in his arms.

While she looked at him in disbelieving gratitude, he asked, "Do you suck?"

"No!" she shrieked, aghast.

So, he dropped her.

As she passed the 12th floor, another man reached out and caught her. "Do you screw?" he asked.

"Of course not!" she exclaimed before she could stop herself.

He dropped her, too.

The poor woman prayed to God for one more chance.

As luck would have it, she was caught a third time, by a man on the eighth floor. "I suck! I screw!" she screamed in panic.

"Slut!" he said, and dropped her.