Sunday, 2 August 2009

How Unlucky Is Ann Hodges?

She got hit by a fucking meteorite.

On November 30, 1954, Ann Hodges was taking an afternoon nap on her couch.

Unbeknown to her, a meteorite was fireballing its way across the sky. The chondrite rock, which I assume means "douchebag" in Latin, fragmented into three pieces during its descent. One of the pieces smashed through her roof and hit Hodges in the hip.

But that could happen to anyone, right?

Actually, no. She is the only one to ever be hit by a meteorite. Seriously, there's no other case in recorded history.

Mrs. Hodges' luck almost changed when she realized she had a rare toddler-sized fragment of potential money on her living room floor. This light was immediately burnt out by swarms of people who wanted to claim the meteorite for themselves.

The United States Air Force, who subscribe to the philosophy that getting crushed by something expensive doesn't denote ownership, helicoptered in and took the rock, presumably mooning Hodges and wagging their dicks as they flew away.

Eugene Hodges, Mrs. Hodges husband, hired a lawyer and got it back. With $5,000 offers coming in, their unfortunately-named landlady Bertie Guy tried to claim it to cover the damages made to the house.

The legal battles, public attention and dwindling offers finally become too much for Hodges and she donated the meteorite to the Alabama Museum of Natural History. I like to think she wiped her ass with it first.

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