Wednesday, 13 May 2009

Parky Is Right About Jade Goody

micheal parkinsonI can't believe for the life of me why people are giving Micheal Parkinson a hard time for voicing his opinions on the 'talents' of Jade Goody. Was she held in such exaltation by the British public that no one can say a bad word about her? Bollocks I say.

Michael Parkinson has actually launched a shocking new attack over Jade Goody by claiming many of those mourning her death were fakers “pretending to be sad”.

Parky's quote about Jade Goody: “all that’s paltry and wretched about Britain today” and also “barely educated and puerile” is spot on. Jade Goody was in the Big Brother house and asked "Where do Portuginese people come from?" and "Where is East Angular" (I assume she meant East Anglia). These are just two out of a mountain of quotes of a similar nature from this girl.

Many so-called mourners are the very same people who used to call her “a pig”, “a racist” and “thick as a brick”. I have no comments on how she looked, I prefer not to discuss things like that, we all look like we do and our looks are just a temporary 'display' until we get old. But she showed herself to be a racist, there's no question about that.

Jade was taken to heart by the British public, the reason for this is beyond me, but it happened. From that moment on, she lived a 'scripted' life. Her publicist Max Clifford told her what to say and when to say it, purely to extract as much cash from her fame as possible.

The only time she was able to act on her own behalf was when she appeared on Celebrity Big Brother. During this show she infamously led a trio of girls as they hurled racist abuse at a beautiful and very talented actress from India, Shilpa Shetty. So there you have it. She showed her true colours when given the opportunity to do so.

Jade Goody was a girl who came from a terrible background, that’s not her fault and it’s representative of a lot of kids from the social underclass, and she was mercilessly exploited, blinded by promises of stardom, not knowing what she’s doing. It was a case of bright, smart people utilising the ambitions and dreams of these underprivileged people for their own sordid enjoyment.

One part of Jade's life that could not be scripted was her death. We all watched on as the papers and 'money men' exploited her to the very end.

Jade's 27 years on this earth were quite active and to be frank, she had quite a bizarre life. But she did nothing special, she had no talents of any description and her achievements were zero. So why do people criticise Micheal Parkinson for speaking the truth ?

Man Flu - It Really Does Exist Girls!

man fluMen with the sniffles will be over the moon to hear that man flu is NOT a myth.

Research has shown that women have a more powerful immune system and take less days off sick.

A whopping 30% of men stay at home with colds and flu, compared to just 22% of women.

And boffins say it is all down to hormones.

According to a new study, the female sex hormone oestrogen boosts the body’s defences against bacteria.

It means oestrogen-based drugs may now be used to give men a better defence against unwanted bugs.

The research looked at an enzyme, caspase-12, which has been proved to raise the risk of infection by stopping inflammation – something the body uses to fight disease.

Male mice with the dodgy enzyme got sick, but the females did not. Researcher Dr Maya Saleh said: “These results demonstrate that women have a more powerful inflammatory response than men.”

She said the finding was also likely to apply to humans, which could lead to immunity-boosting drugs containing oestrogen being marketed.

Studies have already shown that men are more susceptible to infection by bacteria, viruses, fungi and worms than women.

This phenomenon may be down to healthy women being key to successful reproduction.

Dr Saleh, from McGill University in Montreal, Canada, said: “We think nature devised this strategy to protect the reproductive role of the female body and keep the human race going.

“It just dropped the mechanism from the male sex.”

Justin Timberlake's Mother Lover

Justin Timberlake can never be classed as a comedy genius but he is cute, he's as hot as hell actually. Now he has sparked outrage across America with a hilarious spoof song.

JT celebrated Mother’s Day in America by recording a song for Saturday Night Live called Mother Lover, about a pair of friends sleeping with each other’s mums.

However, it seems not everyone in America has a sense of humour.

The Osbourne's Are Eating Each Other

kelly osbourneApparently we'll all be seeing a lot more of Jack and Kelly Osbourne, because they've eaten the rest of the Osbournes and are back to the weights they were when they first filled our wide-screens. In fact, the two of them could probably single handedly fill a cinema screen.

I have problems working out exactly what these two characters give the world that is useful. They do love to appear on TV doing all these bizarre reality shite, which is probably just as well as neither of them is presenter material, neither can sing, dance, act or much else really.

I used to watch Jack Osbourne throwing himself off cliffs with a parachute in the vain hope the chute wouldn't open, but alas it did, EVERY fucking time.

But it's not their fault, it's their glands - presumably their cake glands.

Here's to fat talentless people, especially the Osbournes, may they long continue making lots of cash for being................well, useless I guess.

It's Perfectly Legal To Smoke In A Bar, If You Know How

smaoking ban legal loopholeThe smoking ban in all public buildings that is now in force in the UK has been enforced as I'm sure you are all aware. Smokers were up in arms about it, especially those who like to have a cigarette with their beer.

Indeed, a lot of bars have said that the ban has hit their sales hard as people opted to drink at home, where they are free to smoke as well.

However, under Section 9 of The 2007 Smoking Act (Exemptions) smoking “research” can be carried out in a separate room as long as there is no through bar. That is to say, the main bar must remain free from smoking, but another bar can be designated as a 'smoking research centre' as long as it does not use the same bar as the main room. It MUST have it's own seperate serving area.

All that remains to be done then is to fill out a small questionnaire asking how many cigarettes they smoke and if they like a smoky atmosphere. Then they can sit back and enjoy a fag with their pint.

Most laws that cause uproar can be worked around if a bit of research is done.

Anti-Virus Company Hit By A......................Virus!

kaspersky anti virus hit by virusKaspersky Labs' antivirus mailing list became the unwitting vector for the spread of Braid, the latest email worm, after script kiddies outfoxed the veteran Russian virus fighters.

In a statement, Kaspersky Labs recently admitted the malicious messages was injected into its list after a "massive attack" against the company's Web server during the previous night.

"The attack resulted in a group of hackers sending the subscribers of the Kaspersky Labs' email newsletter a message containing the recently discovered Bridex [Braid] worm," it admits.

Kaspersky Labs has apologised for any inconvenience, advising newsletter subscribers to delete the offending message. Legitimate messages on the list come without attachments, it advises. The company pledged to review its security procedures in light of the highly-embarrassing attack.

"During the last few years Kaspersky Labs has grown to become one of the leading virus experts and this status has attracted much attention from hackers resulting in daily attempts to penetrate of defences," said Eugene Kaspersky, Head of Anti-Virus Research at Kaspersky Labs.

By Kasperky's own account its Web site was hacked, raising concerns about the integrity of Anti-Virus update files available from the site. Kasperky is one of the leading anti virus labs, similar to McAffee and Norton.


If there's something wrong, in your neighbourhood, who ya gonna call..................certainly not Kaspersky, that's for sure.